Forgotten...

So, for the most part my posts have been pretty positive and uplifting. And that is how I've felt most of the time these last couple of weeks. But, I need to vent really fast. I'll probably delete it soon anyway, so it won't really matter.

I'm tired of being forgotten. All of my friends are going on dates or at least doing something fun on the weekends, and I'm not. I spend all my time doing homework, or working on something, and hardly do anything fun. I know I shouldn't complain and should just find something fun to do on my own. But really, there is a limit to the number of movies you can watch by yourself, before you start feeling left behind. I'm really happy for all my friends who are interested in someone, dating someone, engaged to someone, or married to someone. I have none of the above, and yeah, if you're not happy single, you won't be happy married. I know that.

Most of the time, I am happy. But I'm really tired of planning fun things that everyone thinks would be really fun, but obviously aren't fun enough to comit to. I'm tired of having to rely on everyone else for rides and such, or else I would just leave. I would take off and drive when I need alone time, or when I'm tired of being alone, and want to drive and blast the music to vent.

I'm just tired of being forgotten. I want to spend time with the people that I love, but they're all off in their lovey-dovey world, or off despising the lovey-dovey world on their own. It gets old.

And yet, there's nothing I can do about any of it. I'm not going to shut myself off from my friends. I'll keep on planning things, and every once in awhile, it will work out. So, I'll just have to get over it. And probably, by tomorrow morning, or at least tomorrow night, I will be. We probably won't go to Harry Potter tomorrow because everyone else will have something better to do, but fine. I'll sit at home and watch a movie, or play the piano. That will be my fun for the week I guess. I'm just so tired of being disappointed. Don't tell me you're coming if you're not. Don't make me wonder either. If you don't want to go, or aren't sure, then just tell me you're not coming. Don't keep me waiting, and then if you do end up coming, I'll be pleasantly surprised. But I'm done asking a billion times until I get a straight answer.

Well, going on our theme from a few posts ago, here's a little Seuss wisdom to help lift the heart:

"I'm afraid that some times
you'll play lonely games too.
Games you can't win
'cause you'll play against you.
All Alone!
Whether you like it or not,
Alone will be something you'll be quite a lot.
And when you're alone there's a very good chance
you'll meet things that scare you right out of your pants.
There are some, down the road between hither and yon
that can scare you so much you won't want to go on.
But on you will go
though the weather be fowl...
Onward up many a frightening creek,
though your arms may get sore and your sneakers may leak.
On and don you will hike.
And I know you'll hike far
and face up to your problems
whatever they are.
You'll get mixed up, of course,
as you already know.
You'll get mixed up with many strange birds as you go.
So be sure when you step,
Step with care and great tact
and remember that Life's
A Great Balancing Act...
And will you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed!
(98 and 3/4 percet guaranteed.)
KID, YOU'LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!
So...
be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray
or Mordecai Ali Van Allen O'Shea,
you're off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So... get on your way!"
~Dr. Seuss in "Oh the Places You'll Go"